dead christmas

i think the christmas spirit has died along with my father and my heart he took with him.


got 2 gifts this year, and i am returning one of them. since i am fat and it doesnt fit me. yeah my family is poor so we dont get shit. fuck that material items and shit i got my mama and my sister and my dumb fuck brother and my puppy nana. shits go! fuck presents i dont need them. i have people who i love and they surround me. even if they dont love me back, its okay as long as they are happy i am happy for them in a distance. so all you luck children, love your family since they "presents" you received you will forget about them next year.



fuck christmas.

joy.

Short Answers

What qualities best describe this applicant?

Cynthia is able to press on despite tough situations. She is not a quitter.

To your knowledge, does this applicant have a historically disadvantaged background (i.e., low income for several years, first generation college students, inner-city or migrant family)?

YES

Why?

Cynthia had a rough upbringing with an abusive, alcoholic father. I also believe that they are low-income. But you would never be able to tell because she is always so cheerful and ready to take care of others as if she didn't have any problems of her own.

Why do you believe this student qualifies for EOP and what services or assistance would you recommend to help him/her to succeed in college?

Cynthia is highly motivated and desires to do her best. She has grown and matured a lot since I have known her and her potential is limitless.

Please discuss any barriers to achievement the applicant has faced. Do you believe they will affect his/her performance in college?

Cynthia has done well despite her father's lack of assistance. He passed away a few years ago. I do not see any barriers preventing her from doing well in college.

What is your assessment of the student's potential, motivation, or capability for undertaking college work and potential to succeed in college?

Cynthia will do very well in college. She has proven under the most difficult circumstances that she can excel in the classroom and in life. She is motivated, works hard and is willing to listen to those who are willing to teach.

fuck you

fuck you, fuck everything. their is no destination, for the sleepless. cold bitter hateful lonely empty emotions running through these veins driving me insane. i am insane. i know it, it runs through this blood, been passed down for generations. i need to find a clarity, a clear vision of use of this life. i fucked you, you fucked up we all fucked up. shit happens, fuck it fuck this fuck emotions fuck living i am returning to my bitter habits i can sense it. i have no feelings. i dont want feelings i just want loneliness. i dont want friends i want to move far, have no one but someone. i want comfort, i only selfish when i am fed up being nice. so fuck it, fuck you, i am ready i am insane. i am creating new type of nothingness. god deserted us, fuck this christian nation. i hope when the future children grow learn about this place christin influence will be minor. becuz forcing to believe in a god makes it so much harder to live. he fucked it up for us. he didnt make it for us.


all i want is to be in arms of comfort and some clarity. i understand so much more now.

3 hours of sleep.

dizzy and light headed, stumbling the day out. with a few laughs and giggles from the thought of you. i think i can make it through the day knowing that your trying too. so off we go to an epic journey every day and every night. occasionally we would get lost but soon we will find the path that lead me home. our hearts are intertwined, and if i make all the right turns soon i will be with you. so know that greatest joy in my life right now is the thought of you.